I Always Suspected

Driving all the rugrats to school yesterday, I glanced over at the pile-o-crap on the passenger seat and said, "Oh, shoot!"

Sophie: What's wrong?
Me: I forgot MY lunch. I see the puppy-dog lunch box and the kitty-cat lunch box, but I don't see Momma's lunch.
Sophie: That's okay. You don't matter.


(But just in case you think she is a heartless little four-year-old, I think she meant "It doesn't matter." Because she followed it up with, "Just get a plate and walk around to all your friends and ask them to give you something from their lunch. You do have friends at work, don't you?" Okay...she might be a little bit heartless.)

Your Royal Highness

When Frank picks up Sophie from school each day, part of the routine is to go potty before she's in the car and they're on the drive home or running errands or whatever. Yesterday, Frank had to "go" too, so he went into the bathroom with her at school and closed and locked the door.

Sophie (top volume): WHY ARE YOU LOCKING THE DOOR? WE DON'T LOCK THE DOOR!
Frank: You don't lock the door when friends are coming in to go potty, but when a mom or dad comes in here to go potty, it's okay to lock the door.
Sophie: Why? Because you don't want them to see your hiness? *
Frank: Um, yeah. What's a hiness, Sophie?
Sophie: You know...it's your girl parts!

* The author is unsure how to spell this word that sounds like "highness" but may be a contraction of the words hiney and penis. All the author knows, for sure, is that she intends to call Frank "Your Highness" often. If I can stop laughing.

Fish tale

I was shoving stuffed animals in the closet tonight while Sophie got ready for bed, so I overheard the bedtime story she told to Scott. Her fish. It was a really creative tale about Lava-girl. I stepped out to throw some laundry in the machine and came back in for the tale tail end -- Sophie telling her pet: Good one, huh, Scott?

How I love that girl.